[ there is something of a silence that fills the room. his gaze settles onto merlin’s face; he sees the boy, hollow eyed, desperately fighting for his life.
he’s already taken something precious from merlin. it’s his turn to forfeit something this time. so he swallows, and awkwardly positions himself against the wall. ]
...A long time ago, my sister was taken from me. I remember laying in bed...I didn’t know what to do. I couldn’t do anything. I’d tell myself to get up like I always did.
But those feelings...these thoughts dwelled inside of me. A powerless failure who couldn’t even save one child — who couldn’t even save his sister.
I ate. I slept. I didn’t know what time of day it was, I stopped keeping track...I didn’t talk to anyone. I couldn’t. I tried to talk but the words would never leave me.
[ his features soften, and he looks towards merlin. ]
I don’t know what you’re going through right now...but I’ll wait for you. And you have a friend in me, no matter what.
[the smile fades from his expression as he listens, accepts this strange sort of gift - this opening up that happens as he sits back on the bed, hands folded quietly. all of it, remembered and recorded, tucked into his memory to be preserved and woven into whatever story there might be.
he can't relate in the same way - doesn't try to, after so much pain in the world that he tried to understand, to feel. it's simply not his to hold. but he can listen, and understand where it stems from, and gather a reaction based on that. he can hold this secret carefully, and not break it. that at least, he can do.]
...You're kind, Nier. Perhaps too much so for your own good.
[trying to befriend something that will only stand at that boundary and not cross it, knowing how alien they would be in the world. an unasked for existence that walks the line between types of being, and yet has decided to take it all in, because they can.
swinging his legs up, he settles himself against the pillows, propping up his arms behind him.]
Sit, and I'll tell you a story about anything you like. Consider it fair payment for the flowers.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
he’s already taken something precious from merlin. it’s his turn to forfeit something this time. so he swallows, and awkwardly positions himself against the wall. ]
...A long time ago, my sister was taken from me. I remember laying in bed...I didn’t know what to do. I couldn’t do anything. I’d tell myself to get up like I always did.
But those feelings...these thoughts dwelled inside of me. A powerless failure who couldn’t even save one child — who couldn’t even save his sister.
I ate. I slept. I didn’t know what time of day it was, I stopped keeping track...I didn’t talk to anyone. I couldn’t. I tried to talk but the words would never leave me.
[ his features soften, and he looks towards merlin. ]
I don’t know what you’re going through right now...but I’ll wait for you. And you have a friend in me, no matter what.
no subject
he can't relate in the same way - doesn't try to, after so much pain in the world that he tried to understand, to feel. it's simply not his to hold. but he can listen, and understand where it stems from, and gather a reaction based on that. he can hold this secret carefully, and not break it. that at least, he can do.]
...You're kind, Nier. Perhaps too much so for your own good.
[trying to befriend something that will only stand at that boundary and not cross it, knowing how alien they would be in the world. an unasked for existence that walks the line between types of being, and yet has decided to take it all in, because they can.
swinging his legs up, he settles himself against the pillows, propping up his arms behind him.]
Sit, and I'll tell you a story about anything you like. Consider it fair payment for the flowers.